Solomon said, 'All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the spirits.' (Pr 16:2). Writer Isabel Wolseley says, 'I'm a placid, get-along-with-everybody person. But that changed when my friend and I had a disagreement. I told her I was right, and why, and others commended me for having been right. The trouble is, I didn't feel any better ... I felt worse. "Lord," I prayed, "You know I was right, so why do I feel so terrible?" I stewed for several days, then I sensed His answer: "Yes, you were right, but your attitude was wrong!" I won a little victory in a difference of opinion, but I'd lost in the realm of friendship. I asked my friend to forgive me. She did, and our relationship was restored. This happened several years ago, and you know what? I can't even remember what the argument was about. It seemed so all-absorbing at the time. Not now.'
Don't let your need to 'always be right' rob you of opportunities to show grace and allow God to deal with others. To the hard-headed amongst us, James writes, 'Let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.' (Jas 1:19). You must earn the right to speak into someone's life, and that takes time. It also means trying to understand what they're going through, otherwise they'll tune you out. Ask yourself, 'What's my goal? To win the argument? To look good and sound smart?' That's a guaranteed formula for damaging relationships. Paul writes, 'Let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes' (Eph 4:23 NLT).
Bottom line: when you pay attention to the Holy Spirit, He will tell you when you need an attitude adjustment.